It’s been a long time since I’ve written anything here on this blog. Which is why I decided to come with a life update that, I believe, it’s very much needed at this point.
Long story short: I’m evolving.
Into a new me.
I’m closer to the dream I once used to tell you about in my About me section of the blog.
Short story long, though?
Well, if you’re curious, buckle up as this life update will probably end-up being quite long.
I’m in the mood to write.
Which I haven’t been in for quite a while now.
I have to admit, in a way it feels good to have this back.
This urge to write.
To tell.
To share.
The storyteller in me has awakened again.
And maybe it’s no coincidence that it has right as I end an old cycle and begin one anew.
But, as I said, let me tell you all about it in the longer version of the story.
I’ll try to keep it as concise as possible though. Because who reads nowadays that much anyway, right?
Life update no. 1: I end my fully focused Naruto era
Like some of you know, the ones who keep up with me on my other socials, like my Instagram account, I decided to bid farewell to my fully focused Naruto era.
I already explained in there some of the thought processes behind this decision. For anyone who’s curious about what went through my head, feel free to check out the story called “Goodbyes aren’t forever“.
However, today, after being away from it and going through some of these changes and having some introspective moments, I feel like sharing a little bit more about this aspect.
So you see…
It’s not the first time I say goodbye to Naruto’s story.
I’ve done it before, in the past, right here on my blog.
When the story first ended.
But, after some years have passed and I healed that betrayal from back then, I came back to it.
For a while.
Not because of Naruto’s story overall per se, but more because of NaruSaku.
Because NaruSaku has been instrumental in my healing process from back then.
And so, like I said, for some time, I came back to the fandom.
As you guys know, throughout my time in the fandom, I continued to do what I did best: debate, analyze, and… create.
That’s how Kaika Saisei was born.
I explained it here on my blog, on my Tumblr (oh, I see someone else took my old handle, oh wow!), and other places why I chose to create Kaika.
Won’t repeat myself too much, but long story short like I said numerous times, it was my way to make peace with the ending.
I have discovered art had the capacity to heal me a lot.
Like I told you, what managed to heal my wound related to this story was NaruSaku.
To be more precise, it was the NaruSaku zine.
Having to create for it, helped me tremendously to make peace with the fact that the ending happened the way it did.
With Kaika, I dreamed of giving Sakura an alternate ending, not just NaruSaku.
Because despite me rooting for NaruSaku as a couple in the story, for me rooting for them meant also doing it individually, as characters too!
However, despite my continuous efforts, like I told you in the Instagram stories, things didn’t go the way I planned and envisioned for this project.
Which is what pushed me towards the second update that I’m here to talk about…
Life update no. 2: I begin my original storytelling era
I guess this is nothing but expected evolution.
At some point, you want to get out of the shadow of the person who inspired you.
And Masashi Kishimoto’s storytelling did inspire me greatly, despite the medium being different than classic storytelling in the form of written word.
I guess you could say I’m Sakura wanting to get out of Ino’s shadow.
Or Naruto out of Sasuke’s.
No matter how you look at it, today I’m on this path.
On the path of creating my own story.
Maybe this is why Kaika didn’t go the way I wanted. Because I was meant to walk my own road, rather than continuing one that wasn’t mine to begin with.
It was one that pushed and inspired me greatly, and maybe one day I’ll talk more about the struggles and joys I faced, the lessons I learned while creating Kaika.
But life made it so that no matter how much I tried, Kaika didn’t go the way I envisioned it, like I said.
Maybe it was divine intervention or something. Maybe.
I don’t know what it was.
All I know is that things didn’t go the way I wished them to, no matter how much I wanted it. And how much effort I put into it.
Or maybe it’s not its time now. Who knows?
Which is why I decided to put it on an indefinite hiatus.
For now, I was pushed into going back to my own roots. My own essence. Look at myself in the mirror and ask myself: if I would have a story to tell, what would that story be?
Honestly, for a short while I didn’t know what to answer.
So, I just let life unfold until I found it.
And funnily enough, by letting life unfold and just live a little my life’s story other than someone else’s, I found my answer.
And this is how Threads of Fate: Love of a Lifetime that I was telling you on my Twitter came to be.
Like I said on my Twitter cover, inspired by the greatest story never told (that of Naruto Uzumaki and Sakura Haruno), and my very own life, Threads of Fate is now in the making.
When I paused a bit from the craziness of Naruto fandom, the grief of Kaika not going the way I envisioned and all the other things that were happening in my life, the answer showed itself to me.
Through the events of my own life, I was living a story that I would’ve liked to see Naruto and Sakura on (the direction it seemed to go in, at least), and the story that I would’ve liked to tell.
In a funny and ironic way, my realization came to be just the way Tsuyu’s happened in that Jiraiya novel that gave Naruto his name.
You can read more about it here.
More on it, though, in another post.
Conclusion
There’s a reason I say my fully focused Naruto era. Maybe you’re wondering why I feel the need to explain something that it should be implied by the text.
Well, I’ve learned lately through fandom experience that subtext has been lost to the craft.
Sometimes you have to be extremely precise, so that people don’t misinterpret or twist your words.
Of course, not that they don’t do if they truly want to.
But if you have the chance to be clear from the get go, in my humble opinion, you should do it. The fact that others will try to twist that too, well, that’s on them, not on you.
Anyway, to go back to the subject at hand – because as usual I do go on an existential introspective tangent in the middle of another subject.
I say fully focused because with this going back and forth between saying goodbye to the story for good and returning to it, I’ve learned one thing.
Naruto will always be a part of me. Of my identity.
Just the way Sailor Moon along with Fullmetal Alchemist are. Like I said on my Twitter (yes, I’m still not calling it X!) few years back.
Yes, the ending hurt me and when I left the fandom I wanted to cut it out for good from my life.
But then, I returned to it…
Maybe because it’s always easier to return to something that it’s familiar to you.
And to me, for a long while, Naruto was familiar.
It was the story that accompanied me ever since I left my hometown.
So many years ago, until I became the adult of today.
If Sailor Moon was my childhood, Naruto was my teen into adult era. The final transition was done via FMA, of course.
But I always returned to Naruto because I needed to heal my teen era.
I finally managed to do that.
And in doing so, I am now inspired to walk my own path.
I am taking the lessons Sailor Moon taught me in terms of love and imagination. The one Naruto did in terms of emotional bonding.
And FullMetal Alchemist in terms of symbolism, structure and perfecting one’s craft and putting them all together in one.
In Threads of Fate: Love of a Lifetime.
I hope those of you who have been with me, continue to do so.
If not and you only did so for my Naruto era, I thank you nevertheless.
It’s been quite the wild ride!
Like I said, I’ll probably still contribute here and there with content for NaruSaku fandom. But that will only be done through the lens of Threads of Fate.
Because as I told you, there are some funny parallels happening between NaruSaku’s story and my hero and heroine’s ones. And not just with them.
I guess you could say that my hero and heroine are a mix of all the pairings I loved in Naruto into one: NaruSaku, MinaKushi and SasuKarin.
There’s one more similarity, but that one I won’t mention until the book won’t be out.
I don’t want to spoil its contents after all. 😛
Anyway, this is it for now.
If you’ve read until here, I thank you!
With love and consideration,
Chatte.
